I know we speak in hyperbole and exaggerate for the sake of satire but a part of me is genuinely envious of this man. It takes next level chutzpah and belief-in-self to drain the snake just short of your chin right before being thrown in a cage and still run your mouth like you have the upper hand. You can’t teach that kind of confidence, you’re born with it. You know what you can teach? Potty training. This dude must have a learning disability.
And I’m just kidding about being envious of him, this dude is about one screw short of an IKEA coffee table. I’ll take that body, though. Dude’s built like fucking Mario Lopez in his Bayside days.
