How many fucking awards shows can rich and famous people possible gift themselves? Jesus Christ, I didn’t even get a Christmas bonus this year and every two weeks, Meryl Streep is getting a Lifetime Achievement Award. It’s like she’s a fucking cat and has nine lives, all to be honored with a gold statue that is always “more special than the last.”
The latest celebrity circle jerk took place at this year’s Film Independent Spirit Awards, co-hosted by John Mulaney and Nick Kroll. The two comedians did not mince words when taking aim at Mel Gibson, Steve Bannon, Shia LaBeouf, Casey Affleck, etc. I particularly enjoyed the jab about Shia LaBeouf being the type of dude to have crumbs in his bed, because this is definitely a fact.
Stay tuned for the next meaningless awards show probably tonight.