She was sooooo excited to have the kids out of the house after weeks of Christmas Break that this MILF forgot the Cardinal Rule of Winter: don’t mess around on the carpet in the middle of Winter. I’ve already given away a lot of this story by telling you about the static electricity, but trust me when I tell you that this story is worth reading because it’s a painful reminder of why you should always respect the elements when trying to get freaky….Now for the goods.
TIFU by trying to seduce my husband, by terwini
So the obligatory this didn’t actually happen today, but Tuesday.
Our kids finally went back to school after the break, and we had the house to ourselves. Husband was doing paperwork online before going in to work. He came out into the living room to talk with me. I decided I’d try and be playful and take advantage of the empty house. I crawled seductively across the room to try and get him to play. Well, what I forgot is, that it’s winter and there’s absolutely no humidity. So static everywhere. Once I got to him, I was kneeling and he bent down to kiss me. I thought “Hell yeah! I am a goddess and this is going to be awesome!” I mean, we haven’t had sex out of our room, let alone during daylight hours for over 3 weeks because of the kids always being around.
As he bent down, his nose brushed mine. All of that charge I built up crawling across the room then jumped from me to him and went up through his eye! He said he actually saw the flash! The pain abruptly ended any desire right then and there. And not only that, it caused his eye to twitch for the rest of the morning.
TLDR: I tried to seduce husband by crawling across the floor, but instead shocked him so bad that he was left with a twitching eye and no desire for sex.
Dude thought he was going to get some booty but instead he was shocked so badly his eye wouldn’t stop twitching. He saw the booty as the light at the end of the tunnel but instead he was doubled over writhing in pain, without the use of his eyesight. This is why you don’t drag your feet or legs or knees (or tripod) across the carpet during Winter, static electricity will fuck your day up.
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