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New Jersey is a great state. Don’t let the hipsters in New York or Connecticut or Pennsylvania tell you otherwise. It’s home to Bruce, a gazillion diners and jughandles, and Tony Soprano-wannabes who profusely sweat sausage juice out of their veins when it’s more than 60-degrees out. I don’t know how you can hate it.
The Asbury Park Press just published the most Jerseylicious story I’ve ever read since The Situation’s accountant committed tax fraud conspiracy. TLDR: The Bridgegate trial is currently going on. In testimony today with a former Christie staffer, it was revealed that Republican Monmouth County Freeholder John Curley called Gov. Chris Christe a “fat fuck” when he tried taking credit for Hurricane Sandy recovery efforts. This led to a political war of words between the two. Just go read the full Asbury Park Press article, but most importantly read this incredibly exchange:
According to Stark’s testimony, Curley said, referring to Christie, “Who does that fat fuck think he is?”
Stark, a former regional director in the governor’s Office of Intergovernmental Affairs, said Christie then called Curley to express his displeasure.
“Who the fuck do you think you are calling me a fat fuck?” Stark testified Christie said. “I’m the fucking governor of this state.”
Christie then told Curley to be at an event in Keansburg the next day or “I will fucking destroy you” with robo calls to tell Republicans not to vote for him, Stark testified. Curley was seeking reelection in 2012.
Here’s the best part. Curley actually doubled down and recalled NOT calling Christie a “fat fuck” but instead “a fat motherfucker.” I feel like I’m reading a transcript written between Paulie Walnuts and Silvio Dante from the Sopranos:
Curley, reached by phone Wednesday afternoon, confirmed the exchange but said he recalled slight differences.
Curley said the exchange came in Union Beach after Lt. Gov. Kim Guadagno spoke. Curley, who was the director of the freeholder board at the time, said he turned to Christie staffers and said, “So where is that fat motherfucker? Out running for governor? We need help here and these people need help here immediately.”
Curley said Christie called him the next day as he was driving.
“He yelled for a good 10 minutes. ‘F-this, f-that and the other thing,'” Curley said. Curley said he apologized to Christie because he thought it was wrong to make fun of someone’s physical attributes.
Even the politics in Jersey are far too aggressive and Rated R to ever be scripted by the WWE.
Never change, Dirty Jerz.
