Some people aren’t terrific at making sexy talk. Sometimes in the throes of passion, you let all of your inhibitions go and your mouth says some stupid-ass shit. If your go-to line during is sex is “smother me in gravy and toss me around like a cornhole bean bag,” then maybe you should re-think it.
Reddit asked this intimate question:
What’s the strangest thing someone’s said to you during sex?
And the answers did not disappoint.
Daddy’s lil girl.
“My dad has a camera up there (points above armoire) but I don’t THINK he has it on right now.”
The best birth control.
“Don’t worry, I’m already pregnant.”
That’s not how you stroke an ego.
“You know you aren’t the biggest I’ve been with, right?” Totally unprompted.
Thank you?
“You’re so much better than my boyfriend.”
She fucked this poor fella over twice that day.
“Finish quick I need to break up with you” and the reason she broke up with me, she had been cheating on me and preferred the other guy.
A woman after my own fart.
“I gotta fart, pull out real quick!” pulls out brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrtttttttttt
Easy there R. Kelly.
“I don’t know if I’m going to pee, or cum, but something is going to happen!”
How could you not orgasm in an instant with all this sexy talk.
“Where’d you get your curtains?”
Still a better love story that The Notebook.
While eating me out, my boyfriend said “if you fart, I’ll puke all over your vagina”. We’re married now.