How was your spring break? Did you get ridiculously inebriated and do dumb shit like set your dick on fire? Did you get arrested for puking in a police cruiser? In a fleeting moment of recklessness and lust did you eat out the ass of a large, sweaty gal you just met coming out of the restroom at an enchilada joint? Been there. Done that. These foolhardy blunders are part of growing up and are to be expected. The nice thing is that you’re not alone. Many people make rather ill-advised decisions while on spring break, some are cataclysmic, while others are provocative. Anonymous users of the Whisper app share their most shocking and crazy spring break confessions and there was a lot of promiscuity and drunken shenanigans.
“On my senior year spring break to Cabo had a threesome with 2 people I had never met. I don’t even remember there names.”
First off, *Their. Secondly, names are overrated. If you did know their names were you planning on sending them a postcard? “Hope all is well Cindy and Dillon. P.S. Thanks for the threeway fuckathon.”
“Sex in her bff’s bed: check 👍 Sex in her grandparents’ house: check👍 Sex in her aunt’s house: check👍 I’d say successful Spring Break.”
Making lists assists you in prioritizing your tasks, relieves stress, helps you get organized and apparently for this busy bee helps them keep track of which abodes of friends and family that they banged and wiped their love juices all over nana’s throw blanket that has adorable bunnies all over it.
“Since spring break started, every other day I’ve had a threesome. one with a guy and a girl, one with two girls and one with two guys. I like the attention I get.”
The posterchild for giving your daughter attention when she is young.
“I had sex with a guy for $1000 when I was on spring break… And now I can’t help but want to do it again!”
Righteous bucks. Beats working at Mickey D’s as long as you don’t mind that whole random, old, creepy dude putting his crusty thruststick into you.
“I deliberately skipped the first day back from spring break because I dropped acid the night before.”
Probably, no definitely a wise decision.
“I hooked up with some guy all throughout the week after spring break on my roommates bed because she wasn't there. She still has no idea.”
Just tell your roommate that her bed smells funny because you were filleting trout on it.
“Hooked up with 3 girls In a single night on spring break … And now I’m a huge fan of German girls haha!”
Glückwunsch!
“One time on spring break in Mexico, I paid a stripper 400 for a blow job, but I lost my hard on when I went to take a piss before it, so I made the manager take the blowjob off my credit card.”
The customer is always right.
“My friend went down on me on the back of the party bus during spring break.”
Next stop, Mouthfulofshameville.
“I slept with a guy my friend was talking to while we were on spring break Best.sex.ever.”
Proof that talk is cheap.
“On spring break I got drunk, puked, and then made out with a guy 3x w/o brushing my teeth. #IMSORRY”
“Baby, I don’t know if it’s your tongue game or your stomach bile, but you are turning me on.”
“I killed the booty shaking contest last spring break #sorrydad #notreally”
Daddy’s lil girl.
[Whisper]
Spring Break Booty Shaker